shall I call you so or is it a bit too early?
I know some people read the blog regurarly. Thank you. Knowing that you are doing so makes me feel much closer to all of you.
My first week has just passed and I believe I can draw the lines. It has been surreal. Bath seems very far away now and here it doesn't feel like home. I am once again in the uncertainty of not knowing what is going to happen next. I feel like I'm trying to balance myself between the old and the new life, ready to jump into the unknown and make it all change. I haven't jumped yet but soon I will and then it'll all be fine.
I have some exciting news. I have finally found a flat! It is very nice; just on the corner between the Sablon (once of the most chic areas of Brussels) and Rue Haute, apparently also a very chic-alternative street. I have been very lucky to find this place. One of my colleagues is going back to France and she is subletting her room till the end of September. Even though it is just for a couple of months I am moving in anyway. The area is definitely better than where I am staying now, the room is cheaper and I will also live with other people which will make the all experience far more interesting and fun. So I am leaving the B&B on thursday.
The job, on the other hand, is hard. I have never worked in the press office and I don't even know where to start. Every morning I turn my computer on and I literally don't know what to do next! My job is basically contacting journalists and newspapers and offer them our stories. The problem is that my area of 'expertise' is Italy and (sorry for all the Itallians) but it is so hard to make them listen to you. Some people are just so rude and arrongant that it is so difficult to communicate. Sometimes when I am about to dial a number my eyes fill with tears because I know it wiill be another failure. I know I will learn some day and I had some rewarding moments even though it was just my first week. I am trying, seriously, trying really hard.
I use the words 'hard' and 'difficult' too much but this is all I can say about my first week; adjusting is hard and difficult. The positive aspect of this first few days is that I understood I definitely want to work for international organisations, not too sure if I want to work in their press office though. This is the reason why I want my boss to notice me. I think I am so pushy that we reached the point where every morning before going to his office my boss stops by my desk to let me know that he is very busy!! I am sorry but I just want him to understand that I am doing the best I can.
My colleagues are very sweet. They are all trying to help and they involve me in everything they do. We have lunch together every day. The first day we went all to have a drink and they made a welcome toast for me. I am really impressed by how friendly they are. It is nice. It makes you want to get up for work in the mornings.
My weekend is a bit boring though. I am afraid I am now in the 'worker mode', meaning that you spend alll your weekends sleeping, cleaning, doing your laundry, ironing, shopping etc. Also my laptop decided that it was a good time to stop working. Therefore, today with 150 degrees I walked for more than half an hour to find a place that sells Apple products to find out that they ONLY sell Apple products and that the centre for reparations is in another city, it's open only during the week and you can reach it only by train! My mom has found another that might repair macs so I am going to call them next week because they are even further than the one I went to today and I don't want to go there for nothing!!
I have also tried the launderette around the corner. I can't use the washing machine in the B&B and so for the first time today I went to the self-service one. I hated it!! I am sorry, I know I sound like a spoilt brat but the idea of sharing a washing machine with someone else it just doesn't make sense to me. I am a bit of a control freak when it comes to cleaning and I find it disgusting! I didn't even know how to operate them and I found a very kind man who helped with everything! I am really lucky in that sense; I always find someone who is willing to help me! They probably feel sorry for me!
I couldn't wash everything because I didn't have enough money so I had to choose between they whites and the colours. I might go again tomorrow but I still think it is better to wash them in the sink with the soap. It is so much of a hassle though that I will probably end up ging to the launderette anyway! I just find so funnty how I am such a snob but I always get myself in to these situations that are not at all compatible with my nature! I don't know how this keeps happening!!
Anywyay, there is another problem I have here. Everything is so expensive that I keep feeding myself salads, bread, eggs, pasta, vegetables and cheese (but only the cheap ones). The result is that I am always hungry, I have to watch the quantities also , and that I am afraid I will gain too much weight because of all the carbs I eat!! I don't understand how people can say that England is expensive. I paid 4.50€ for half a pint of beer! You never pay that much in England unless the pint is made of gold!!!
You probably sense that I am not very happy. I will try to explain how I feel. Two trains of thought are goign on in my mind at the moment. One is that I am simply shocked. I love England, it is my home and I miss it. Here it is Europe and in many ways it is like Italy and I left Italy because I didn't like it. I find difficullt to understand their pace of life: they come to the office when they want (9.30 in the morning is just me and a couple of Americans), businesses work less during the weekends when the people who work all week need them etc. The job is new and everything is just complicated because I don't speak the language and I don't know the city. The second train of thoughts is that I am satisfied with myself. I am proud of what I achieved just by using my brain and with hard work. It is rewarding. Just by working my way through I made it where I wanted to be and it just makes me feel so well and so happy with myself. I know there is still loads to do but I am doing it and so far it has paid well.
So this is all for now. I am sorry it is all depressing and very deep. I just reflect and think about things a lot. I like analysing everything that is happening it too. I believe I do it because it makes it easier to cope with the new situations I have to face.
OMG what a scary moment! There is a thunderstorm at the moment here now and they have a strange pipe system going around the all house so you hear like water pouring in every room!! And I am alone in the all building because the owners are away for the holidays and the place is closed!!
You will hear for me if I survive I guess!!
This is all for now!
Good Night
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